Sean Tyler Stem. April 17, 1989- March 29, 2016
About a week and a half ago my little brother passed away of a drug overdose. Mother Fucker, fuck fucker fuck.
I am okay. I might not be in the best head space being that I am so fucking sad and feel wounded, but okay. . Everything just feels so weird. It's like a part of me is missing but at the same time it still doesn't seem real. So yeah. Fuck fuck fuck. (apparently I swear A LOT when I am sad)
I want people to know about Sean and what and why it happened, but at the same time I kinda don't want to talk about it yet. It's still really raw. Also I am not the greatest with emotions and right now I am still processing and feeling and just being. But I do want people to know that Sean may have had his problems but he was such amazing, kind, sometimes a cocky, but such a talented person. He was so full of the brightest light, laughter, generosity and so so much love. He really was a great person (and I am not just saying that cause he is dead) A person that I am so blessed and lucky to get to call my little brother. He made everyone smile, even when you didn't feel like it. Every person that came into his life are greater for having had him here.
The rest of the family is doing. It's so weird being together as a family without one of us, it seems so off because wealways do everything together and I keep getting that weird feeling that I am waiting for his ass to show up (he was always late for everything). Oh man, it's a hurt that will not quit. So yeah, we have been spending all of our time together (so much togetherness it's kinda sick). We laugh and cry and get angry and are sad, and go for walks and eat (well they eat. People keep bringing food, all meat pasta dishes so I am just nibbling on carrots... FYI people, sad people eat veggies too!) It's been rough, but we have so much love for each other, the same sick sense of humor (the things we have been saying...and he can't talk back. HA!) and are so close. We truly are so lucky to have each other. (even if we are driving each other crazy)
And Life, gots to keep doing it. So I am going to start trying to get a little consistency back into mine this week, start working on the house again, catch up on bills and paperwork, and clean the sheets on my bed. (it's been 2 weeks.. gross) Also going to try and do a post or two... I miss it and the kitchen is my therapy.
I miss my little brother. He was such a shit, a good shit, but a shit no less. But just because he is dead doesn't mean he doesn't exist. He will always exist.
Here is the obituary of Sean T Stem written by my sister Shannon with the help of her friend Hilary.
[Above photo was taken off of his facebook page. It's one of my favorites.]